Saturday, November 14, 2009

The pain of my heart.....

This may make no sense to anyone but I am not concerned about it. I only write it to relieve my emotions that must be purged through words.


Dear Jesus,

You know every aspect of my heart and soul. You are currently moving and stirring things in my heart.
I know that like Therese, my vocation in life is to love. Not just a mere romantic love or caring love but
a burning love of charity- only the kind of love you can impart to a human heart. I do not know how to handle all the love you hand over to me to give to others. I cannot even take the time to make sure they accept the love or even want it but I must continually give this love because it gives relief to my poor little heart. My body and helpless heart cannot contain the love you give- so I must give it to others. My heart is breaking with Your Divine Love. It continually cracks and tears in order to make room for more love. I realize now that is why I feel the pain unless I freely give of myself to others. I have to obey your command and give until it hurts and until I have nothing left to give. Please stay by my side Lord, because I am only as strong as You allow me to be at any given moment. It's strange because even though I feel as if I were to be consumed in Your love, my body remains the same. I appear to be totally untouched, but if anyone could take a picture of my soul, they would see a complete transformation. My soul is not complete in the plans you have made for it, it is merely under the construction of Your Divine Love. This must be why there is so much pain at this time both physical and spiritual, yet I can withstand it as long as You remain in me, I will gladly endure it for it gives me consolation to know that You are working on your littlest heart. The one who has no room for a fleas love - yet You my precious Lord are preparing my poor heart for an amount of love that not even a Galaxy can compare to. I will not think how it can happen Lord, but I only trust in Your plans for me and am at your feet Lord waiting for Your next Command of me. Please, sweet heart of Jesus, all I ask is that you never allow me to do my own will -only Your will Lord, Only Your Will.
Sacred Heart of Jesus, how little I love You compared to Your love of me!

your littlest heart of love.